Keep informed about our journey, Gay Into Straight America! Each week, we send out a newsletter. Below are links to the ones we have sent since the beginning of our year long journey, which began September 11, 2005. The most current one is at the top. Note: The last newsletter for this journey will be the December, 2006 newsletter, since our year long journey will be over; however, Stand UP Speak OUT, Inc. will continue with other projects. Gay Into Straight America was its initial one. Click here and sign up to receive our newsletter that will come from Stand UP Speak OUT in 2007. Those who have already been receiving this newsletter will automatically receive our Stand UP Speak OUT...Live Authentic newsletter.
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Rylee Joy says, "I'm heading to Canada for Mama Rob's and Mama Dot's Wedding."
Nov 21, 2006
You can't hate someone whose story you know.
Dare to know the story of those who are different.
“The tiniest story in your life can deeply touch another.
You cannot know the effect your story might have.”--Sark
In this newsletter Update:
- Third time's a charm as we legally marry in Canada
- Interview on Thanksgiving Day with radiogay.ca
- Rylee Joy's final lesson (#10) from the journey
- Comments from our new friend, Sue
- Jeff Foxworthy's comment resonates with us
Yes, third time's a charm! Whatever it Takes!
"I come to you with an open heart. I vow to transform myself and our world through the expression of my love." This vow that we have spoken to one another perviously will continue to be the foundation of our relationship as we head to Canada to be legally married today, Thanksgiving Day, 2006.
As most of you know, we were first legally married in Portland, Oregon, on March 7, 2004. We sealed our commitment with our spiritual wedding on July 31, 2004, doing what so many in our country do every day as part of the marriage ceremony. Our Story is here if you have never read it.
Although Portland voided our legal marriage a year later, that second part, our spiritual wedding means we are still married. In the legal sense, we thought Washington would be the next state to offer marriage equality inclusive of same gender couples. That didn't happen.
We decided that since Thanksgiving is our favorite holiday, we will take this opportunity to legally marry in Canada. It is a time for us to be grateful for life, love and one another. We approach this day with gratefulness and a recommitment to our own relationship.
The pic below gives you an idea of how close our home in Blaine, WA is to Canada. Our plans are to marry on the beach in White Rock at 4 p.m. Rylee Joy will don her rainbow scarf, and carry our rings in a pouch attached to a rainbow necklace. Having been unable to be at our past weddings, she is determined to participate this time!
Different from or wedding on July 31, 2004, this one will be small with just us and our two witnesses, Kathy and Robert Reim. Kathy is the state PFLAG chair in Washington, and Dotti officiated at the wedding of her daughter, Rachel, and her spouse, Tammy, on July 4.
Finding a marriage commissioner was not without some hitches, even in Canada. It appears that Canada is not immune to discrimination. Click here to read. Fortunately, that allowed us to continue our search, and the perfect commissioner to marry us showed up! Details on our wedding, along with pics, will be in our next newsletter!
We will be interviewed today at 7:30 (PST) on RadioGay.ca in Canada after we marry.
Click here to read about the show, called UNGLUED (on air from 6 p.m. - 8 p.m. PST). Click here to listen live to our interview at 7:30 (PST).
We were recently interviewed on the Joe Teehan show, called "The Liberal Outpost." This is the second time we have been on his show. We discussed guest hosting for him in the future when he is on vacation. Stay tuned!
Rylee Joy's Lesson # 10
Click here to read
Comments from Sue
On Saturday, November 4, 2006, we gathered with both Kathy Keifer and Nan Macy (our documentary filmmakers) for dinner at Nan's home.
Sue Lenander, a friend of Nan's from Montana, joined us. Click here to see the "poodle ornament" she gave us at dinner. Don't miss the tag and what it says! This poodle is now hanging on a lighted tree that stays us in our bedroom all year long. We have special ornaments on it. It is actually the Christmas tree I gave my grandmother in 1991 when she was almost 95 years old. She died less than a month later in January. This tree was the one thing I wanted. In link to the picture, you can barely see an "ornament" on the tree of me sitting behind her in the bed with the tree behind us. Click here to see an upclose picture of us. She had not had a tree in years when I gave it to her, and big tears rolled down her cheeks as I placed it in the corner of her bedroom where she laid in a hospital bed.
After arriving back in Montana, Sue wrote the following to us:
"Reflecting on all the peace and wisdom I received on my trip, I thought of what a gift having dinner and a soulful conversation with you both was. The work you have been doing is work of true peacemakers. I also want to say that I went away from our dinner feeling very hopeful about lesbian relationships. Two women who love each other and are willing to "do what it takes" to make that relationship strong is a beautiful thing to see. Progress not perfection. Thanks so much for being vulnerable and sharing who you both are and sharing your adventures with me. Thank you for also giving me a safe place to be vulnerable and share my fears and hopes.
I'd go on the road with you if I could - YOU GIRLS and YOUR POODLE ROCK!!Helen Keller would be proud to know you both too!!! Keep looking for the magic!!"
To each of you like Sue, we say "THANK YOU" for your support. Remember, however, that you are "on your own road" anytime you decide to be. How? By "standing up and speaking out" in your own community, right where you are! That is what we hope to inspire people to do. Helen Keller was once asked, “What would be worst than being blind? She replied, “Having good eyesight and no vision.” Create a vision in your own community. Be like Helen Keller and commit, "I will not refuse to do the 'something' I can do!" Each journey begins with a bold move, and each bold move is a journey!
Jeff Foxworthy's comment
When people at nightclubs early in his career wanted to call Jeff Foxworthy a "redneck" in a demeaning way, he quickly realized that the way to empower himself was to "own" the name. Needless to way, with his approach, this has not only NOT hurt him, it has made his career. His point coincides with one we use. If we don't find offense in people thinking we are gay, or if we will share our authentic selves with people, because we have no shame about "who we are," then we can embraces ourselves, and people cannot hurt us with information that we are OK with them knowing.
He may be a "redneck," but his remarks resonate with us! When people at nightclubs early in his career wanted to call Jeff Foxworthy a "redneck" in a demeaning way, he quickly realized that the way to empower himself was to "own" the name. Needless to way, with his approach, not only has this NOT hurt him, it has made his career. His point coincides with one we use. If we don't find offense in people thinking we are gay, or if we dare to share our authentic selves with people (because we have no shame about "who we are"), then we can fully embrace ourselves, and people cannot hurt us with information that we are OK with them knowing.
From the real and true adventures of two women and a poodle,
on a life-long mission to transform ourselves and the world,
one person at a time!
Life is an adventure…enjoy the ride!
The light in us honors the light in you, Dotti, Roby & Rylee Joy